Youth who are contemplating suicide frequently give warning signs – some more subtle, others more pronounced. Parents, friends, and other trusted adults are in a key position to identify the signs and get help. Suicide is preventable.
Talking openly and honestly about emotional distress and suicide is okay. It will not make someone more suicidal or put the idea of suicide in their mind. While teens who feel suicidal are not likely to seek help directly, knowing how to acknowledge and respond when thoughts of emotional distress or suicide are shared with you is important.
Suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death among teens and young adults 15 to 19 years of age.
(2023 CDC)
Key Risk Factors
- Behavioral health concerns: Depression, anxiety, substance abuse, or bipolar disorder.
- Trauma and abuse: History of abuse, bullying, or family dysfunction.
- Social isolation: Lack of support, relationship problems, or feelings of rejection.
- Life stressors: Academic pressure, major life changes, or loss.
- Risky behaviors: Self-harm, substance abuse, or access to lethal means.
- Previous attempts: A history of suicide attempts increases future risk.
The Link Between Underage Drinking and Teen Mental Health
Research shows that underage drinking can significantly increase the risk of suicide among teens. Alcohol impairs judgment, making it harder for young people to manage emotions and more likely to act on impulse. Teens who drink are more likely to experience depression, anxiety, and feelings of hopelessness. Open conversations about alcohol and offering support can help protect teens' mental health.
Warning Signs
- Talk about wanting to die – They may say things like, “I can’t do this anymore” or “I wish I wasn’t here.”
- Express feelings of hopelessness – They may feel like nothing will ever get better.
- Withdraw from friends and activities – Avoiding social situations or losing interest in things they used to enjoy.
- Show changes in mood – Increased sadness, irritability, or anger.
- Have trouble sleeping or sleeping too much – Noticeable changes in sleep patterns.
- Give away personal belongings – Giving things away or saying goodbye to people.
- Engage in risky or self-destructive behavior – Increased use of drugs or alcohol, reckless driving, or self-harm.
- Lose interest in school or work – Falling grades or skipping activities.
- Experience sudden calm after depression – A sudden sense of peace may signal they've made a decision.
- Talk about feeling like a burden – They may believe others would be better off without them.
If you notice any of these signs, take them seriously. Reach out for help immediately.
What you need to say and do
Remain calm and listen. Be a safe person. As a parent, you want to fix it right now and you’rescared and uncomfortable with the situation. You want to ensure they feel safe and that they can talk to you. Don’t try to intervene and fix it immediately. A good rule: Say 2 words to every 100 words your child says.
Validate and Encourage: Use “I” messages to help validate their feelings. Use a safe and non-threatening approach. Ask them- “Is there anything you want to talk about” or “is there anything I can do?”
Ask the tough question - “Have you thought about suicide” or “Have you thought about ending your life?” Then listen. You’ll never find out if you don’t ask. You asking gives them the opportunity to feel safe and feel like they are allowed to share.
Potential responses to help guide you:
- “You are not alone in this. I’m here for you.”
- “You may not believe it now, but the way you’re feeling will change.”
- “I may not be able to understand exactly how you feel, but I care about you and want to help.”